Isaiah 1:16-20
NIV
16 Wash and make yourselves clean.
Take your evil deeds out of my sight;
stop doing wrong.
17 Learn to do right; seek justice.
Defend the oppressed.
Take up the cause of the fatherless;
plead the case of the widow.
18 “Come now, let us settle the matter,”
says the LORD.
“Though your sins are like scarlet,
they shall be as white as snow;
though they are red as crimson,
they shall be like wool.
19 If you are willing and obedient,
you will eat the good things of the land;
20 but if you resist and rebel,
you will be devoured by the sword.”
For the mouth of the LORD has spoken.
The Message
16 Go home and wash up. Clean up your act. Sweep your lives clean of your evil doings so I don't have to look at them any longer. Say no to wrong.
17 Learn to do good. Work for justice. Help the down-and-out. Stand up for the homeless. Go to bat for the defenseless. Let's Argue This Out
18 "Come. Sit down. Let's argue this out." This is God's Message: "If your sins are blood-red, they'll be snow-white. If they're red like crimson, they'll be like wool.
19 If you'll willingly obey, you'll feast like kings.
20 But if you're willful and stubborn, you'll die like dogs." That's right. God says so.
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Today...
We got snow yesterday and I believe it's still snowing lightly now. We haven't had as much as some areas south of us over the last few weeks, but I am happy this storm finally gave us some.
Our big kids have their last day of school before Christmas break. I helped them assemble treat bags with homemade goodies and homemade magnets for their teachers and gather enough mini candy canes for their classmates. Instead of gluing little beads in our magnets like the ones I found in Family Fun magazine, I printed mini pictures of my kids and random shapes/pictures. I looked at bead ones just now on their website and I think I want to make more.
Izzy has a friend over to play. This is something that has been needed by her and her parents for some times now. It keeps her busy and gets us out of the pattern of, Izzy does something destructive/very naughty, we feel like failures as parents because it's never ending with her...REPEAT!
Trav shoveled at the preschool and is now snow-blowing the driveway. I fixed a rip in a pair of jeans quick as it had gotten bigger than when I bought them. Oops! I have to find my iron still from when we moved a couple of weeks ago. I couldn't even tell you where I kept it at the old house as that's how much I use it. But, I have to sew a quilt today that I'm making my dad for Christmas, so I HAVE to find my iron TODAY!
Oh, and amidst all my frustration, searching, wondering, trying to decide how much is too much, when to say when, when to keep fighting, where are You leading me God (from my post last night, er, this morning since it was midnight), I'm fasting today. I don't do this often enough as a way to listen to God. When I do do it, I feel so connected with Him. I caught a little bit of someone talking last night from YouTube and he mentioned that fasting is mentioned in the Bible but we rarely do it. Whack! That totally slapped me across the face. So that's that. I'm fasting today, hoping I'll open my heart and ears to what God is saying to me.
Our big kids have their last day of school before Christmas break. I helped them assemble treat bags with homemade goodies and homemade magnets for their teachers and gather enough mini candy canes for their classmates. Instead of gluing little beads in our magnets like the ones I found in Family Fun magazine, I printed mini pictures of my kids and random shapes/pictures. I looked at bead ones just now on their website and I think I want to make more.
Izzy has a friend over to play. This is something that has been needed by her and her parents for some times now. It keeps her busy and gets us out of the pattern of, Izzy does something destructive/very naughty, we feel like failures as parents because it's never ending with her...REPEAT!
Trav shoveled at the preschool and is now snow-blowing the driveway. I fixed a rip in a pair of jeans quick as it had gotten bigger than when I bought them. Oops! I have to find my iron still from when we moved a couple of weeks ago. I couldn't even tell you where I kept it at the old house as that's how much I use it. But, I have to sew a quilt today that I'm making my dad for Christmas, so I HAVE to find my iron TODAY!
Oh, and amidst all my frustration, searching, wondering, trying to decide how much is too much, when to say when, when to keep fighting, where are You leading me God (from my post last night, er, this morning since it was midnight), I'm fasting today. I don't do this often enough as a way to listen to God. When I do do it, I feel so connected with Him. I caught a little bit of someone talking last night from YouTube and he mentioned that fasting is mentioned in the Bible but we rarely do it. Whack! That totally slapped me across the face. So that's that. I'm fasting today, hoping I'll open my heart and ears to what God is saying to me.
Letting it all out...
Hypocrisy
Here it comes.
I want it all out. I sometimes want out of Christianity.
Christians are ridiculed for being hypocrites.
I wonder when people talk about church if they are talking about the church they go to or if they are talking about The Church. I struggle when they are talking about their church and not His Church. Are there boundaries? Should there be?
I feel God has a distinct purpose for me. I don’t believe He wants me to be a quiet, go with the flow, dress my best on Sunday mornings Christian. Yes, I do occasionally dress my best on Sunday mornings. But it’s not to fit in, it’s because that is what I want to wear that day. That sometimes is my best, and other times it’s my best ripped jeans, because that’s what I’m comfortable in that day. Am I a hypocrite on the days I dress nice?
I don’t want to live a stale, run of the mill, with the grain of the wood Christian existence. I want to push the limits, but only because I think that’s what Jesus would do. I think He would challenge many believers to go outside of their comfort zone, to reach out to the dirty man, to help the neighbor in need even if he doesn’t live next door and your family has know his family for generations.
Recently I was approached with a service trip that would bring me out of my comfort zone. No opportunity to dress in my Sunday best, much less shower. I considered cutting my hair super short because I wouldn’t have the opportunity to shower for a week or more. My husband disagreed with my talk of cutting my hair. I felt God pulling on my heart, telling me, “Go where I send you,” and to follow Him.
I hurt when I don’t feel that I can go because of finances. With my husband on full disability and myself in school full time and 4 growing kids under our roof, there often is too much month left at the end of our money. Still, God provides, right? I struggle to know if I am following His call or the desire of my heart. But then again, if it is the desires of my heart, doesn’t God grant those too? Or not? When to say when and when to say no and when to say go… I get scared sometimes, like I did last week reading about a previous trip that was taken. I got scared and worried about what God would ask of me. I tried to brush it off. But I thought, can I do what He asks of me with full surrender? We will be blessed financially when it comes time for me to go on this trip so that I could pay for it all on our own. But it will be a little late in the game, so the costs for the flight will be much, much higher. Is this what God is asking me to do? To sacrifice a little more to follow Him? But what about my family? Is He asking them to sacrifice for MY heart’s desire? So that I can be gone a very long time from them to serve others? Is this His calling for me to set an example or am I being selfish to do that to them? I requested funds from two different sources, one a congregation’s mission board, who said they would provide approx. 1/8 of my costs, and the other a different congregation’s foundation, who said, “no” because it doesn’t fall under their mission to further their congregation and programs.
So where does this leave me? Frustrated, broken hearted, feeling abandoned by God…after all, I asked Him to provide financially so I could serve others. And lastly, guilty, for being frustrated, broken hearted and let down. How dare I. How dare I ask local churches to support me financially when it’s for something as out of the box as going to serve homeless people, travelers and others who would probably never set foot in a church. How dare I get upset that they wouldn’t want to help pay for my plane ticket when they will probably NEVER see any benefits from my trip. How dare I think that this trip is about me gaining some experience working with people who are different than mid-westerners. How dare I leave my family for that long. How dare I spend money that could be saved for a rainy day (as I was told by one “friend” to do if we had a little extra rather than go on a trip similar to this). How dare I miss my college classes, as they are so valuable to my education towards receiving my social work degree.
I’m at a loss of what to do. Do I fight to find other funding, though I have no idea where from? Do I suck it up, and use up money our family could use to go? Do I lay down and see it as another opportunity lost? Do I give up my dream of being a different Christian and be the hypocritical one I’m probably seen as anyway, because heck, if I can’t get the “regulars” to see it differently, maybe it isn’t different after all and I’ve been deceived, and fighting a losing battle all along? Do I surrender, AGAIN, to God to provide? At what point do I say enough is enough and lay down, roll over, let the “have not’s” have the last say? Do I pick up my sword and shield and defend what I believe is truth? When should I give up? When do I let them have it the way they want it? What do I do in the mean time? When will they, someone, anyone, who could maybe sway them, come around? Will I always be fighting this fight? Will church ever become about The Church and not our church?
What would Jesus do?
Here it comes.
I want it all out. I sometimes want out of Christianity.
Christians are ridiculed for being hypocrites.
I wonder when people talk about church if they are talking about the church they go to or if they are talking about The Church. I struggle when they are talking about their church and not His Church. Are there boundaries? Should there be?
I feel God has a distinct purpose for me. I don’t believe He wants me to be a quiet, go with the flow, dress my best on Sunday mornings Christian. Yes, I do occasionally dress my best on Sunday mornings. But it’s not to fit in, it’s because that is what I want to wear that day. That sometimes is my best, and other times it’s my best ripped jeans, because that’s what I’m comfortable in that day. Am I a hypocrite on the days I dress nice?
I don’t want to live a stale, run of the mill, with the grain of the wood Christian existence. I want to push the limits, but only because I think that’s what Jesus would do. I think He would challenge many believers to go outside of their comfort zone, to reach out to the dirty man, to help the neighbor in need even if he doesn’t live next door and your family has know his family for generations.
Recently I was approached with a service trip that would bring me out of my comfort zone. No opportunity to dress in my Sunday best, much less shower. I considered cutting my hair super short because I wouldn’t have the opportunity to shower for a week or more. My husband disagreed with my talk of cutting my hair. I felt God pulling on my heart, telling me, “Go where I send you,” and to follow Him.
I hurt when I don’t feel that I can go because of finances. With my husband on full disability and myself in school full time and 4 growing kids under our roof, there often is too much month left at the end of our money. Still, God provides, right? I struggle to know if I am following His call or the desire of my heart. But then again, if it is the desires of my heart, doesn’t God grant those too? Or not? When to say when and when to say no and when to say go… I get scared sometimes, like I did last week reading about a previous trip that was taken. I got scared and worried about what God would ask of me. I tried to brush it off. But I thought, can I do what He asks of me with full surrender? We will be blessed financially when it comes time for me to go on this trip so that I could pay for it all on our own. But it will be a little late in the game, so the costs for the flight will be much, much higher. Is this what God is asking me to do? To sacrifice a little more to follow Him? But what about my family? Is He asking them to sacrifice for MY heart’s desire? So that I can be gone a very long time from them to serve others? Is this His calling for me to set an example or am I being selfish to do that to them? I requested funds from two different sources, one a congregation’s mission board, who said they would provide approx. 1/8 of my costs, and the other a different congregation’s foundation, who said, “no” because it doesn’t fall under their mission to further their congregation and programs.
So where does this leave me? Frustrated, broken hearted, feeling abandoned by God…after all, I asked Him to provide financially so I could serve others. And lastly, guilty, for being frustrated, broken hearted and let down. How dare I. How dare I ask local churches to support me financially when it’s for something as out of the box as going to serve homeless people, travelers and others who would probably never set foot in a church. How dare I get upset that they wouldn’t want to help pay for my plane ticket when they will probably NEVER see any benefits from my trip. How dare I think that this trip is about me gaining some experience working with people who are different than mid-westerners. How dare I leave my family for that long. How dare I spend money that could be saved for a rainy day (as I was told by one “friend” to do if we had a little extra rather than go on a trip similar to this). How dare I miss my college classes, as they are so valuable to my education towards receiving my social work degree.
I’m at a loss of what to do. Do I fight to find other funding, though I have no idea where from? Do I suck it up, and use up money our family could use to go? Do I lay down and see it as another opportunity lost? Do I give up my dream of being a different Christian and be the hypocritical one I’m probably seen as anyway, because heck, if I can’t get the “regulars” to see it differently, maybe it isn’t different after all and I’ve been deceived, and fighting a losing battle all along? Do I surrender, AGAIN, to God to provide? At what point do I say enough is enough and lay down, roll over, let the “have not’s” have the last say? Do I pick up my sword and shield and defend what I believe is truth? When should I give up? When do I let them have it the way they want it? What do I do in the mean time? When will they, someone, anyone, who could maybe sway them, come around? Will I always be fighting this fight? Will church ever become about The Church and not our church?
What would Jesus do?
Friday, September 24, 2010
Heavenly...
Here's the deal: Enter to win an ERGO performance baby carrier: http://www.heavenlyhold.com/pages/contest.htm ISN'T THAT A GREAT DEAL? You can also find them on FB at http://www.facebook.com/pages/Marietta/Heavenly-Hold/46816267621
Saturday, September 4, 2010
Monday, August 23, 2010
Not Me Monday/You Say It's Your Birthday!
Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blogto read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.
Well, here goes...
First off, I have not been neglecting my blog for, uh hum, months, and now only choosing to write when it can get something (a.k.a. enter for a prize). How completely selfish would that be? Because, well, it's SO NOT my 30 birthday today! I would never publicize that kind of info for the masses to read.
I did not start college today, well, come to think about it, I did not attempt to start college today seeing how I missed the message as to the fact that classes don't officially start until 3:00 today. I did not get a sitter, drive to the campus, find my (dark) classroom, walk away, text my husband some useless nothing, walk back to my (dark) classroom, walk to a different seating area, call my husband with something useless, walk AGAIN to my (dark) classroom, walk back to the second seating area, start a conversation with someone I didn't know about how I might be loosing it, get informed that some classrooms had changed, go to the computer lab and try to access my classes only to be told that I had been deleted, walk back to my (dark) classroom, find an adult I knew and asked only to be told I don't really start until tomorrow. Oops! (Oh, and I didn't search the house and vehicle to only come up with 1 pencil for me to take with me to my first (unofficial) day of school! Guess I gotta make a Target run!)
After that, I DID NOT go lay in a tanning bed for 8 minutes. (Please feel free to refrain from any cancer comments on this post.)
I did not have lunch with a (guy) friend and laugh really loud in a public place, cause well, I do not laugh loud...ask any of my youth! They can testify to the fact that my laugh is so soft and quiet, just like me!
And finally, I am NOT SUPER DUPER excited about my birthday present from my husband...A NEW (to me) BACKPACK! He won it on ebay and it will arrive in 4-11 business days. It's so cool, brown plaid! Okay, okay, truth be told, I'M REALLY EXCITED TO GET IT!
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Monday, February 22, 2010
NOT ME MONDAY
Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have
not been doing this week.
I am not dreading going to my office this morning since it's 10 degrees and -3 wind chill. Nope, not me, cause I'm a tough Minnesotan with thick skin. I would not rather stay in my house all day today. Regardless of any itching for Spring I may be having, I can handle the cold whipping in my face, on my hands and around my collar. I'm not wishing that my meeting, the only reason to leave my house today, would get canceled, postponed or otherwise rescheduled.
I am not going to fill the rest of this post with a boycott for prayers for our friends the Thackers. They have been "waiting" since the earthquake in mid-January to bring home their precious Reese from Haiti. Last Friday Sarah flew to Haiti to bring her son and 4 of his friends to the US to their families. Sarah's husband Dave is in Florida awaiting their arrival. PLEASE, PLEASE read their story and be praying for them as things have turned crazy there and Sarah has been separated from Reese and the other kids. http://www.thethackerpack.blogspot.com/
Monday, February 8, 2010
Not Me Monday
Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.
Well, in my attempt in eating healthy this weekend I did NOT made up a new chili recipe that included {tofu} and bulgur wheat and I of course TOLD my husband of the creation before he consumed it. What kind of wife would I be if I didn't tell him of the goodness he was eating? I truly loved it.
I am NOT thinking that I've had too much sleep lately. We have four kids and recently moved, so that would be totally crazy. I should be so sleep deprived I can't think straight. I have NOT had long naps for 3 days in a row with either Izzy or both girls. I did NOT stay up (after Trav fell asleep) last night by myself until nearly 1:00 AM because I wasn't sure if I could fall asleep. I did NOT watch Fireproof for the most part by myself, cause that would be kinda weird.
Disclosure...THIS DID NOT HAPPEN: Me: "Are we gonna do something for Valentine's Day?" Trav: nodded the affirmative Me: "What?" Trav: shrugged shoulders Both: BUSTED OUT LAUGHING *I have no idea what that was all about, but to say that it makes me feel old, like we have no clue what we are going to do for Valentine's Day, so of course haven't done anything to get a sitter cause we don't know what to tell her about times. Will we do something? Probably, maybe, who knows! Will it be last minute? More than likely, if we are lucky enough to get a sitter.
It's a snow day here, and while my eldest three kiddos spend close to 4 hours outside in the snow while Iz and I napped for most of that, I'm NOT still looking forward to BUNCO tonight! I mean, really!
Monday, February 1, 2010
Not Me Monday
Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.
Here I go:
I was not feeling guilty about not having posted to my blog since December 21st! And realizing it is now February 1st, I did not think, "I wonder if it even matters anymore." Upon realizing that it does matter to me, I did not commit to blogging this Not Me Monday post today with the hope that I will post something else before next Monday.
Being gone all of last week (6 1/2 days to be exact) I was not totally convicted of how I typically react to my children and their behavior. I did not take the refresher of "Discipline is teaching" to heart and have been trying to be more calm. I am NOT nervous that this is a short season and that I will go back to being a total crab. Overall though, my week was refreshing (when I wasn't be convicted) and I did NOT think that I would love to live in the big city, knowing my husband would probably go into convulsions at the mention of that desire.
I'm most definitely not toying with the idea of being a vegetarian. I have not been restricting my meat intake recently while trying to decipher what God intends for me. I did not pick up the book, "Skinny Bitch" and I am NOT thoroughly enjoying reading it. I am feeling NO guilt for the crap that I've put in my body and am not vowing off soda, among other things. (I don't think I can go vegan, however, as I love my grilled cheese and I buy my eggs locally!) I did NOT feed my family veggie stir fry with {tofu} yesterday and it most definitely not make me want to go and buy more tofu and plan my meals with it!
And finally, in my attempt to be more healthy, I have NOT committed to limiting my coffee intake! AH...WHAT HAVE I DONE!
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